Wednesday, September 26, 2007


Pardon me for this (paste) "post" but I just couldn't resist. I have been mulling over these wise words too much lately... I'll probably write more about my thoughts on it sometime later. But for now, I'll just paste one of my favourite poems ever! :-D

Have you read it several times over? Read it once again.
Have not read it even once? Read it at least once.


If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!

--Rudyard Kipling

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Sunshine, Dementors and the Boys

Tough times are here again, professionally at least. A little bit on the social front too. And on the personal front, well..... all I'll say is that it isn't anything unexpected. Something not foreseeable surely, but certainly not unexpected. Smile and move on. A drop in the ocean...

Have been listening to this extremely catchy and cheerful number called "Sunny Came Home" by Sean Colvin. I absolutely love it! I guess I'll send it to someone just to spread cheer...
I close my eyes and fly out of my mind Into the fire....

Talking of cheer, I must mention that there's a pall of gloom descended on the halls of residence lately. People are either sad, worried, troubled, anxious, depressed, angry or irritable. It is pathetic how these invisible dementors, as I call them, feed on our negativities and banish all cheer and sunshine. Talking of sunshine, the sun glows in me no more, the spring sings in me no more...

Surprisingly cricket, of all things imaginable, provided the much needed respite from this ocean of melancholy. It was exciting, hair raising and absolutely thrilling to watch "the boys" demolish the Pakistanis with such relish. I am full of admiration for the young and enthusiastic new captain who clearly managed to infuse hope, team spirit and determination in the sad, beaten and haggard team ridden with politics, self-interest, thirst for money and craving for more advertisement contracts. The worth of the Big Three (or their absence) was refreshingly palpable in this victory. I was all "happy, happy!" after having successfully cast aside the shroud of gloom, fatigue and mental upheaval for at least a few hours during and after the match. Well done, boys! I sincerely wish this new enthusiasm and team spirit continues.

Oh, I had fever too. Somebody asked me what kind of fever that was. Well, where do I begin? :-P I had fever. Period. Temperature. Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. I think I caught it from J - I spent a considerable part of the night in her room.

And I realised I positively dislike pushy and imposing mothers. Just a thought. I might be assuming. But a thought nevertheless.

I'll get back to my calling. It has been quite a while...

Music of the Moment: Aankhen teri itni hasee... (Maula Mere) by Anwar.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Shut up!

That is what I need to learn to do. Shut up. Give a rat's ass to moral indignation, principles over people, standing up, fighting... It won't take me too far in my life especially if I need a healthy social life. Shut up no matter what. How does it affect me anyway? I'll talk if it affects me, not otherwise. Certainly think about my friends' interests alone no matter even if their actions spare no thought for mine or anyone else's interests. How could I be such a hypocrite? Being a friend and a fighter at the same time... ? How dare I dare!

But no! I don't ever learn, do I? My voice is uncontrollable. It makes itself heard at every occasion my conscience demands it. Take for instance the case of the poor chicken which was all set to be part of " a game for entertainment to rid the campus of boredom and get some action in". Teams of five members each were given five minutes to chase the little bird all around the quadrangle vying for the coveted "I-hunted-chicken-fastest" prize. Yeah, that is what our idea of entertainment has come down to. The "chasers" "hunting" for the chicken while ensuring to "handle it with care"....

Alright alright, my voice says to the person (?) who came up with the idea of organising this "sporting event", don't give me that "What? Animal Rights, eh?" look of disdain cuz i haven't even gone into that issue yet. I am talking to you like you are a civilised person and that is my mistake, alright. I assumed you are not from some godforsaken archaic village where cockfights are relished with glee even to this day, I'm sorry. I was careless enough to miss out on how you postponed your coveted "game" to make way for an international law firm to conduct job interviews, you are sensible alright. What if they saw you chasing a chicken around campus? Would you be offered a job next year if they remembered your attractive mug? You do have a brain, albeit pea-sized. Congratulations!

And then, I should have shut up. But no, I didn't. I let my voice do all the dirty work. I got disdainful and menacing looks from people, "oh-it-would-have-been-good-fun-this-animal-activist-spoilt-it-all" jeers from creatures I would best describe as sub-humans. Never mind if they didn't realise it wasn't about animal rights - not yet. It was not about being humane yet - they hadn't gone past the even the "human" stage. It was about being civilised. It was about being dignified. More pragmatically, it was about following the law and not getting the University into trouble for lending its premises for "sports" involving cruelty to animals. It wasn't about animal rights yet. It was just about abiding by the law. Human law and Statute law.

My voice did its work well and there was no chicken hunt in college. Thank God for small mercies. But I should have shut up. Who cares about the enormous sense of victory welling up inside my heart? Who cares about the enormous self-satisfaction? Who cares about the chicken - they are not chasing me around!

Why should I talk when its about others? I'll talk when its me. Never mind, if everybody else shuts up then - it isn't about themselves, is it?

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Wishes and Rants

It is a close friend's b'day today. It has been almost four years since we met. It seems so long ago - as if it has been [FOURTEEN] years or something. As I spoke to her this morning, I realised how long a period four years is. And how much I missed her. And how much she means to me. This realisation had never hit me with such force.

Familiarity breeds contempt, they say. Distance takes you only that much closer. However, we never felt unfamiliar to each other this morning - not even for a moment. It was as if we hadn't missed anything at all. Yet, I missed her. Happy Birthday to you, my friend! May you have a wonderful year ahead. :)

It is another friend's b'day today. Happy Birthday to you too. I hope you have had a wonderful day the distance notwithstanding. :) Interestingly, these two friends don't share their birthday with each other...

Which reminds me. I hate these courier companies - they make "personal" communication so expensive. Remember how a couple of guys working from a garage brought down the whole ISD calls business and made it practically redundant? I hope the same thing happens with the courier companies too. Unfathomable though it seems now, you never know... *sigh*

And the internet... well... it is just the internet at the end of day. It forever lacks the "personal" touch. Or perhaps it doesn't. It is all in the mind I guess. I'm ranting away. Let me stop writing before I stop making any sense at all...

Happy Birthday once again, to all concerned...

Monday, September 10, 2007

Luck - with strings attached!

I got a four-leaved clover today. On a tarot card. A group of friends were particularly excited about this one particular tarot reader on the net who apparently gave excellent predictions which "made sense". I was quite piqued by the (tacky) idea of thinking mentally about a question I need the answer for and staring into his "eyes" on the screen while he dealt me the cards. I tried it out and got a four-leaved clover as one of my first "sensible" predictions for the day.

Technically, I chose it but I would like to believe the card chose me - seems more clairvoyant and exotic. ;) (you know how these things work with the mind...) However, it turned out it wasn't such a good thing after all when it came "surrounded" by four other "negative" tarot cards. (I was supposed to choose five cards in all.) So the effect is supposedly negative. If it came with other negative cards, the explanation to the card said, I would have disagreements, fights and unpleasant experiences with loved ones. Hmmm... not so inaccurate after all. (The bit about unpleasantness and fights I mean...)

Further, it expressly mentioned, "surrounded by a bad card, you will have loss or disappointment." And as luck(?) would have it, the other cards were indeed "negative" what with coffins (sorrow, death of loved one), clouds (failure and associated despressants) and flowers ("you will get the love of Libran women" - not very pleasant when I'm a heterosexual woman myself, is it?) masking all the good luck.

Oh well, you can't have it all, can you? Thank God, I don't take these tarot cards too seriously. (Remember my earlier post about His gifts?)

I'm still intrigued by the Libran woman part though. Perhaps it assumed erroneously that I was male...

Music of the Moment: ay lets not kill the karma.... ay lets not start a fight.... (Beautiful Liar - Beyonce ft. Shakira)

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Hollow Monk

The Monk who Sold his Ferrari.

Really? If he wanted to be a monk after all, why would he bother to sell his Ferrari? He would have just given it away to the first man he saw, don't you think?

I am yet to decide if the hollowness of the title matches up to that of the content! And just to be sure, I wish to state expressly that it is one of the worst books I've ever read in my life. The last I heard, there was an entire book of Robin Sharma's quotes on how to live life or some such associated trash. I would advise Robin Sharma to actually become a monk and spare us all the torture. Or stop taking himself so seriously for once.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

A Clover and a Song

This terrible headache woke me up. I have been unable to get back to sleep. Feeling awfully restless since then. For lack of the mood to talk about better things, I'll talk about the week that passed.
It was a busy one, this week. The coming week's going to be busier. A presentation, a couple of applications, two vivas, two submissions and two projects is pretty much to do in one week isn't it? Provided moral support to a friend for her first job interview. Lunch was decent. I was told recently, quite contrary to what I believed, that I was not a very happy person. It seems to me now that it was prophetic more than factual. The usual cheer has been avoiding me for many a day now. The summer in me sings no more - more like a sore throat, actually.
The mind is again playing dirty tricks with me. Very well, two can play this game. My game however, won't be dirty. I play fair even if it is the most unfair enemy.
I am reminded of a painting - not very uncommon - depicting a scene of the great battle in the Mahabharatha. Krishna, the charioteer deftly holds the reins of five strong, brilliantly white horses, each running in a different direction from the other, while Arjuna aims an arrow at the enemy on the battlefield. Interpretation has it that the five horses represent the five senses, each running amok - wild and carefree and beyond the control of the being. One who gets a hold on them just as Krishna manages them with his reins so effortlessly, wins the battle of life.
So beautiful, isn't it? The Gita, the Mahabharatha, the Ramayana are oceans of wisdom. I wish I could partake of at least part of this wisdom sometime. It would make my life more fulfilling.
For now, I could do with a four-leafed clover. Yes, not all of them have only three leaves. If a four-leaved one shows itself to you, it means you are in very very good luck.
Yes, I need a four-leaved clover. Now.